Monday, July 4, 2011

run on ramblings and other nonsense

     I promised I would be back to writing on a [slightly more] regular basis, but alas, I have broken that promise, again. It seems that there is a lot of untimely, if there is such thing, and unexpected death around me these days & I sort of distracted myself from thinking about it with a constant whirlwind of activity. Now that my offspring are out of school for Summer break, I am not waking up at 5am and going going going until I fall into bed each night, which also means I have more time with my warped brain, and that's never good. Neither are run on sentences, but right now I'm just happy that my fingers are keeping up with my brain.
    In April, my husband's best friend was found dead at the age of 48. This man had been a part of our daily life for over 20 years. His (what we were lead to believe was mysterious and untimely) death, we found out in a most unnecessary & shocking way at the post service reception thanks to his ex-wife's inebriated hateful father, was self inflicted. The details aren't necessary to my ramblings so I'll just say that my husband was shocked, gutted, and in a whole new kind of agonizing emotional pain. This was a man he saw more than his own family. Troy and my husband worked together, too. So, that was a big jolt to our family and one of the reasons why I just sort of drifted away from much of the Internet goings on.
    Whilst I have been away, I have learned of the deaths of 2 other people whom I may not have "known" in what some folks refer to as "real life", but who were friends nonetheless.
    Being the Grim Reaper was not my reason for opening my laptop today and typing for a bit. What I have been mulling over for the last however the hell long it's been is why I stopped writing on a regular basis. I used to write, a lot, and damn it was good stuff if I do say so myself. I had quite a nice flock with whom I truly enjoyed bantering and interacting. I also had a handful of really awful folks, but I have never been one to back down from a challenge, so I jabbed and kicked with them as well.  I loved writing, rambling, ranting, ridiculing, what have you, but I just stopped sort of abruptly.
   I do miss writing. I miss having a place for all the strange thinks that I think to go so there's room in my skull for new thinks. I shall go off and ponder this now over a bowl of chocolate ice cream.
    I hope everyone is healthy and well and causing a heap of trouble!
 Kisses and all that crap~A
   

4 comments:

  1. You have a way with expressing yourself, that I find curiously interesting and enjoyable.

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  2. I have a notebook to let my brain babble...
    But I have to admit, I'm not completely open there either not wanting to hurt people who read it if something happens to me.
    Loss of friends is painful, doesnt matter the details of the friendship.

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  3. Seeing his blog there in your list has started the tears again-damn it's hard...

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  4. Welcome back! I for one have missed you. Though all my friends are very nice I have missed your and your in your face writing. It's like a dish made wuth an important spice missing. Now if I could only reconnect with Heather and Shupe this would be real fun!

    Fortunately I haven't lost any friends but there has been a recent death in my family. A slap in the face that brings you back to reality. Live for today and appreciate what you have.
    It's good to hear from you my friend.
    ps I still have your phone number and would love to talk to you someday.

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