Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Bless me Ed Begley Jr for I have sinned

     I wonder if there’s a 12 step program that can help me? I reduce, reuse and recycle. My offspring have been taking their waste mega penis, umm…I left my laptop unattended when I went into the kitchen to take my blueberry cake out of the oven and my 14 year old son added “mega penis”…so, where was I? Oh yes, my offspring have been taking their waste free lunches including cloth lunchbox sized napkins in awesome fabrics (made by me, let me know if you want a set *end shameless self promotion*) for years now, I bake, grow a fair amount of my own produce, shop locally, use only organic body products, etc. etc. etc. green goddess blah blah get to the point you crazy woman: I TAKE REALLY LONG SHOWERS!!

     There, I said it. Despite all of my efforts to be an environmentally responsible global citizen, I loooove taking long showers! I know it’s wrong, I do, and this summer, when it was warm and toasty in the house, I actually did the start/stop shower method where I turned off the water when I’m, well, not standing in it rinsing. But now that it’s a wee bit chilly, all that does is make shaving the goose bumps off my legs that much more painful. All of those green living books recommend keeping your showers around 5 minutes, no more than 10. Right. How am I supposed to exfoliate wash condition shave whathaveyou all my various and assorted bits and pieces in 5 minutes? Plus, I have some of my best ideas in the shower! Cutting down my time might thwart my creative flow and we can’t have that, can we? What to do? Anyone? Ideas?

   I have mentioned to my family on more than one occasion that I could benefit from a pool boy. It was then pointed out to me that I don’t have a pool *sad face*, so there went that dream of an extra set of hands to expedite my showering, or something like that. Now that I see that in print I suspect that a pool boy would have added more time to my shower ritual. Ok, back to the drawing board…

   Oh! I have a great idea! I should take a shower and see if I can think of a solution to my long shower addiction ☺

    What’s something you do that you know you shouldn’t?


  1. An easy way to rid yourself of the shower addiction: turn off the hot water!

  2. I'm not very green. I'm so ashamed.

  3. I bought this house partly because it has the hugest built-in tub, and I fell in love with deep tubs that actually fit a grown human in Amsterdam. First I found the hot water tank ran out when there were 3 inches of water in it. So I got a tankless heater which runs hot forever (a wonderful thing, by the way). And I found that there were cracks in the cement grouting or whatever from the house settling, so that each bath led to wet spots in the ceiling below. So I sealed the tub with clear caulk only to find that the caulk immediately grew some form of black mold or otherwise discolored to make the tub look like a hazardous waste site. So I don't really have any secret vices; they are just to damn hard and costly to keep up. I might just as well spend my time recycling.